The rules of bagsies.

10/30/2008 04:55:00 pm

There are not enough desks in the UNSW library, not even close. Every week it seems like more disappear to make room for a giant empty space or another staff meeting room. I'm not sure why the library staff have so many meetings, or so many meeting rooms, but I digress.

Lately, in order to get a desk you need to either be incredibly lucky with especially good timing, or you need to sleep there overnight by somehow evading the security guards. Obviously there is a hierarchy of desk as well, so the time you arrive at the library (assuming you did get kicked out by a security guard the night before) will dictate how far up the library tower you need to go, how many people you will have to share with, and what kind of chair, if any, you should expect.

If you do happen to be lucky enough to get a desk, there are certain rules you must follow in order to retain the right to stay there. These are the rules of bagsies:

1. No sleeping. You can sleep at home, you don't need to do it slumped over a desk in the library.

2. Move to the window. This is similar to when you are on the bus and it is very crowded: you take the window seat, not the aisle, it's just common sense.

3. No migratory notes/backpacks/personal belongings. When it is busy, you only get to take up one desk. One desk, the one next to the window. That is all.

4. No long lunches. It is fine to take 20 minutes to stumble to Barker Street MacDonalds and caffeineate. It is not fine to go to Macquarie Uni, have lunch with your girlfriend, then come back expecting to take back the same desk. Do not call your friends and talk about lunch either. They're only pretending to care.

5. One book does not a bagsie make. This is the fundamental rule. One library book left on a desk does not reserve it as yours.

In order to rightfully stake your claim, the minimum you must leave behind upon taking a break is your notebook, some scrunched-up paper, lecture notes, a textbook, some pens, your water bottle, an empty coffee cup, half a packet of M&Ms, and some orange peelings.

Unless you do this, anyone, ANYONE, can come and take you desk while you are at Macquarie Uni and you have absolutely no right to complain upon your return.

These are the rules. A library desk is a privilege people, not a right.

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